This reminds me of a beast fable an old man with an erection told me from behind the bushes of his estate. It goes like this:
“Psst. A porcupine meets a beautiful frog in an empty apartment both want to rent. The porcupine and the frog like each other so much they do it in front of a mirror, and afterwards they agree to never share any personal information, not even their names.
They keep meeting in private and *WHISTLE NOISE* each others brains out using extra large *DOORBELL RING* on each others’ *KAZOO SOUND* while they *SQUEAKY MATTRESS*. One night after a bad argument the porcupine puts a stick of butter up the frog’s *CLOWN HORN* and they *SLIDE WHISTLE* on the balcony in broad day. Until one day the frog wants to know the porcupine’s name?
‘My name is Sneaky Larry,’ it says. ‘And I like to poke.’”