All posts tagged "My Therapist: Satan’s herald"

Hey, is it weird that my therapist makes me meet him at a bus stop? He won’t explain it to me. Just some vague muttering about restricted airspace and black helicopters. I put up with it though because he’s been teaching me how to trust myself, and only myself. And not the government.

Therapist is right? Therapist IS right!

Therapist is right. Paranoia IS just having all the facts.

Therapist is right. Mother IS an emotional Ben Bernake.

Therapist is right. Whittling birch wood IS the best way to form a spear.

Therapist warns of a rush on the yen. Therapist calls the Treasury department “the silver coffers of the do-nothings.” Therapist enjoys the familiar weight of a single-shot pistol.

Therapist has an online degree.

Of Mans First Disobedience, and the Fruit Of that Forbidden Plumbing, whose Flush perseveres through the Eternal Fire and hath brought “Blah” unto the World, and all our Woe.

Unto Newlyweds whose monogrammed Robes mask Not who forgot what at Sears; Unto a patient Priest, Eyes Wide Shut, Drowning out the Begging Prayers of a Supplicant with his own Slovenly Dream that one day he reach Level 6 on Angry Birds; Unto the Silver Tongue of my Anti-Government Therapist who canvases write-in votes for a Chuck Norris Presidency.

One Day at a Time, we hope, our Plumbing is Restored. In loss of Eden, shine thy Handyman O Lord. One great man to Unclog our deceit. Deliver unto Us a Schneider. We take comfort in these words as Prophesized:

So up on your feet. Up on your feet
Somewhere there’s music playing.
Don’t you worry none
We’ll just take it like it comes.

One day at a time, one day at a time.
One day at a time, one day at a time.
One day at a time, one day at a time.
One day at a time, one day at a time.